I wanted to share one insight with you ladies from my book, "Women's Ministry Insights". I have chosen this one below because I find most women's ministry leaders are stressed out the most about this topic. I think it's because it's kind of a lost cause and there is only so much you can do to get younger and older women fellowshipping together on the same level. Read through and you will find out what I mean. My "Women's Ministry Insights" book is a collection of things that I've learned from women's ministry over the years and is available on Amazon here.

From the book, "Women's Ministry Insights, published March 20, 2020

I have learned that no matter how hard you try or how much effort you put into it, nobody, even women’s ministry leaders, will never close the generation gap.

I find this to be another hot topic in women’s ministry right now. Someone said it should be done, so everyone is trying to hitch their wagon to that train of bridging the generation gap. But in reality, if you know people, you know it cannot be done.

People have tried for centuries to close the gap of the generations. Mark it down. People of different ages have different views. It’s just that simple.

Why do you think back in that famous Titus 2 chapter that Paul is directing advice to different age groups? He talks about the older men. He talks about the younger men. He talks about the older women. He talks about the younger women. Paul knew each group would be hanging out together. He knew they needed different instruction.

I get this question in some form every week either in an email, private message, or comment on my women’s leader group on Facebook, but everyone wants know how to close the generation gap or how to bring the older and younger women together.

Maybe they ask what kind of Bible study would appeal to all ages of women. Maybe they want an activity that appeals to all aged women. No matter how the question comes in, I’ve noticed that women’s leaders are seeing this imperative need to mix the generations.

My question is—why? I get the need for everyone to get along in the body of Christ. I get the need for young women and older women to have a respect for each other. I get the need for the older women to teach the younger. I get the need for the younger women to learn from the older. I get the need of older women setting examples for the younger.

What I don’t get is why this imperative need has arisen in women’s ministry that all ages of women have to come to have a multi-generation everything.

I have seen discussions where some leaders think it is some kind of necessary calling or something. Like they aren’t a modern church doing God’s will if they don’t mix up the generations somehow. It is biblical that we teach and learn from each other, but I find that different than this crazy idea that we are meant to build some kind of bridge to mix generations.

I find this one of those crazy things that women’s leaders are expending huge amounts of time worrying about. Or I see them investing huge amounts of time and money into programs to bring this said unrealistic thing about, instead of really just concentrating on ministering to the women in their churches. They are so caught up in trying to build some unrealistic bridge to nowhere that they forget about teaching and encouraging the women they want to cross the bridge.

I’m not implying that we can’t do some function from time to time for everyone to fellowship together of various ages and that it can’t be a blessing. That’s not it at all, but what I’m suggesting is you have to really evaluate why this is so needed.

Maybe I’m just blessed by being in very good church where we have church-wide fellowships of various kinds where everyone mingles. On a whole though, young people like to be with young people. Older men like to hang out by themselves to discuss their frailties and golf game. Younger women that are moms like to hang out with other moms to discuss their children and schools. Sports moms like to hang out together. Single women like to hang out. Older women like to chat with each other about their ailments and grandchildren. It’s just how it is.

Can we make some programs and opportunities to connect older women with the younger? Of course, but that isn’t going to close the generation gap. I think if we just teach our young women to respect the older women and the older women to respect the younger women, that will further bringing the generations together more than anything.

Can we do some mentoring where older women are teaching the younger? Yes, of course, but that is just part of being in the body of Christ. That should be done anyway. Teaching women to teach the younger and the younger to learn from the older should be part of our discipling through our churches. It has nothing to do with closing the generation gap.

That is where the real problem lies. We have to get back to that discipling thing and teaching baby Christians how to teach and learn from each other in the body of Christ. Let’s work on that discipling thing to teach women to be Christ-like. Then we don’t have to worry about getting generations together— teaching and learning from older to younger and younger to older will be taught like it should.

I just feel some of these things that come up in the world of women’s ministry gets our women’s leaders so frazzled and under so much needless pressure that they don’t have time to concentrate on the things that really matter. Let’s get back to that love thing. Shall we?

Forget bridging the generation gap. Jesus already built a way over the gap from sin to God, so the only bridge that I am concerned with is already in place.

Copyright ©2020 Julia Bettencourt. Insight #24 "Women's Ministry Insights" book.

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